The Fragile Male Ego
Beneath every struggle and conflict in the world is the powerful seed of patriarchy. The feminine, woman power either scorned, ridiculed, her power unacknowledged, her contribution undervalued, her sacred space violated, her compassion misused, her contribution made invisible.
It is as if the male ego can exist, thrive, bloat or become free only in the suppression of the female that creates him. This struggle within each man to free himself of the powerful female force that nurtures him and which he knows he comes from, creates an inherent violence in the male. It is a vulnerability that he cannot shrug away from. A debt of existential gratitude that creates a violent reaction in him. That deep down he can never be completely male. Some, attempt to resolve this inner violence by venerating the female as a goddess. Some, try to abuse the female as an external expression of the inner struggle to claim and become purely male. And, in between these two extremes are the million shades of grey of masculinity and its equation with the feminine. We either have toxic masculinity or we have the emasculated male. The world has no model to share for the resolved, balanced male. The fragile male ego is born out of this anger and lack of a balanced model.
As long as man sees woman as the 'other', it is as if he sees a stranger not quite human as himself. Just an other, someone to be patronized, used, abused, adored, reduced, tamed, conquered, or venerated, rarely worthy of respect or as an equal. Rarely as an extension of himself. That is why his ego is fragile. For his very sense of being wholly male hangs by a thread, a social construct of superiority supported by patriarchy.
He needs to shine the light within. The freedom he seeks to be completely male will never be. Come what may, he cannot wish away the truth of the fact that his existence emerges from the female. For he is born with the female within him. This core truth of identity needs to be embraced. Not merely understood but embraced totally. So when the female is in authority, it is the female part of him in authority in the world. When he understands that, he accepts feminine power with ease, grace and as an integral power balance and not as a challenge to his power to be fully male. The male is the creation of the female.
Every female carries the potential of male within. She creates the male. She recognizes this inherently as truth. She sees herself as a natural male and female combination for she carries both within her. Every male in the world comes from her womb. There is hence no conflict within her. Her struggle is in getting the unhealed violent male to understand this truth.That, he is always half female.
The only redemption for the male is not merely in reconciling or finding the female within or male within but in seeing oneself as always half female. From birth till death. When that becomes the very core of one's identity then one sees the female element all around as a sense of natural identification, an integral half of oneself. The struggle disappears. The female has her rightful place as an integral half of the world. Then the seed of creation coming from the man takes tremendous sacred significance. A deep accountability into the sacred cycle. The womb of the woman takes on a powerful role of nurture and creation. The circle of life from seed to a beautiful tree of life watered and nurtured by both grows.
This is healing. The circle of hate and struggle closing forever. The mother struggle resolved and at peace. The ego having nothing to feed on and finally at a place of sacred peace. For when half of oneself is female within, every woman on earth is the missing half. It is called coming home to oneself.
- SS (28/2/2020)